Visiting a “friends” Facebook page I saw something that floored me…something childish and in my opinion stupid! I probably shouldn’t have been shocked like I was because I’ve said a million times, you never really know someone…even after years of talking you just never know. People are good at being fake…unfortunately I’m real and tell it how it is and I guess I expect the same, but my expectations and the reality are very different…
Sometimes I just feel very alone…like I’m surrounded by people from another dimension…LOL…there’s just so much I can’t understand these days…lord knows I try..I read, I listen and I try, but in the end I’m just alone…
My hubby gets it, my kids get it..but my extended family…they don’t get it…I have few “friends” and that list is getting smaller…they don’t get it…it’s hard…
Maybe it’s meant to be this way…I’ve always been an independent kinda gal, never fit the status quo, never fit in, always viewed the world through a different lens, don’t follow the crowd just because it’s the popular thing to do…I’ve always been a bit of a loner, thinker, quiet, reserved, observant, don’t speak unless spoken to, lover of deep conversation kinda woman…it’s hard in our loud shallow world…people like me aren’t appreciated, questions aren’t welcome and facts are hated..lol..
We learn to just stay quiet for the most part, unless we are passionate about something then we speak up…usually met by lots of opposition and explanations why we’re wrong…sigh
The shallowness I see in our society these days is astounding…critical thinking skills are all but lost…facts are not important these days(to most)…memes and reels on social media have become news sources…hate & lies are the new fashion statement!
No one likes questions that challenge their beliefs…those that challenge are labeled difficult, argumentative, mean, evil, uneducated, etc…it’s kinda funny because the truth is they don’t have answers, real answers…they just repeat what’s been told to them…and because of that, they have no solid answers and blame the challenger for causing problems.
It’s a real struggle…I know I’m not alone, I just live where I’m surrounded by people different than me…they have a right to live and believe as they see fit…but man! It’s soooooo hard. I feel alone…not lonely necessarily, but I would love to have a friend that could have deep, meaningful conversations about the really important things! A person that cares as much about the state of humanity as I do, that cares about the earth, and is spiritual and not religious, a person I can count on no matter what..a person not offended by my not believing in the god if Christianity…I believe in a higher power, but certainly not the god of Christianity. A person who understands we, as a society are treading on thin ice in a very bad place…our very way of life is at stake! A person that in their heart understands freedom…not just freedom for certain belief systems, but freedom for all to live life and make choices as they deem necessary in their personal lives…is that asking to much? Am I being unreasonable, unrealistic? I don’t think so.
I’m tired…
Today marks the end of some things in my life I’ve needed to let go of for a while…the end of a chapter, the end of trying to fit in, the end of pretending to be ok, the end of remaining friends with people I simply cannot relate too, the end of feeling I don’t have a voice…
Starting today, it’s the end…
THL
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