Tuesday, October 8, 2024

Church Abuse

 

I’ve written several post about my Christian experience. I want to be very clear that I understand not all church experiences are like mine. I understand that if you haven’t experienced what I or millions of others have it’s difficult for you to understand. I am not here to bash your beliefs in God. I am here to educate about this issue.

I write about my personal experience so others that may find their way here know they are not alone. I also write so that those that read here can learn about this very real and detrimental issue. It’s everywhere. Most do not recognize it. Many, many people are sitting under pastors and attending churches that are causing “Religious Trauma”. I’m going to share a bit of information on signs and symptoms of what “Religious Trauma Syndome” entails and how it impacts those suffering. It will also include things about “Stockholm Syndrome”. This is very dear to my heart and I do not want see anyone else hurt by people claiming to live God and do his work! 


What about Stockholm Syndrome?

The Stockholm Syndrome is a strategy of survival in a very, very bad situation.

Perceived threat to one’s physical or psychological survival and the belief that the abuser would carry out the threat …leaving the situation would result in being shunned, “marked to be avoided,” or “counted as dead,” it is almost impossible to escape the situation because the cost is too high.

In order for the Stockholm Syndrome to take effect the following conditions are necessary: One person threatens to kill another and is perceived to be capable of doing so. The victim cannot escape, and her life depends on her captor. The victim is isolated from support, or in the case of hostages, the knowledge that other people are trying to help them. The captor shows kindness as well as violence increasing with the victim's sense of being totally dependent on the captor.

 In my opinion, Christianity is the world's largest case of Stockholm Syndrome. All the pieces are there.

*Christians tell people that God will kill them, or rather, send them to hell, which is even worse. If the person believes in God, then he is certainly perceived as capable of doing this. After all, he's God.

*They are also told that they cannot escape God's judgement, and that everything in life depends on God. The success of this tactic is illustrated by the number of Christians who claim that without God, life has no meaning and is not worth living.

*There is no one to support them except for God. The only other being who might have the power to do so, the Devil, is presented as being powerless, and even worse than God.

At the same time, Christians are quick to point out how good God really is. He only threatens us because we deserve it.

The parallels become especially sick and twisted when we consider the analogy of the Church as God's bride. If that's the case, God has all the earmarks of an abusive husband, and it's no wonder that the cries of his followers sound so much like the cries of a battered wife.

What Is Religious Trauma?

Religious trauma is any trauma that takes place in a religious setting, often through psychological or emotional distress or emotionally manipulative practices.

Religion can play an essential role in a person’s life, and many may find incredible fulfillment in exploring their religious beliefs and practices. Many may also utilize these spiritual beliefs and communities for personal healing.

However, others experience negative religious experiences that can create religious trauma.

What Causes Religious Trauma?

Religious trauma occurs when a religious official or religious community uses a person’s spiritual beliefs against them to impact a person’s actions, decision-making, and well-being.

Causes of religious trauma include:

Using guilt and shame to control behavior

This often occurs in organizations that have strict moral codes and rules.

Strict gender roles

This is especially harmful when it is used to justify discrimination, shaming, or power imbalances between different genders.

Fear-based teaching-Hell

This often occurs through threats of eternal punishment, impending apocalypse, or some kind of spiritual damnation.

Excommunication and shunning

This occurs when “disobedient” members of a faith are isolated from their religious community. Their family and friends may be instructed by religious leaders to cut off contact with them.

Repression of critical thinking

This occurs when religious leaders discourage discussions of questions or critiques.

Physical, emotional, sexual, or financial abuse

This is often caused by religious leaders taking advantage of their positions of authority.

Is Religious Trauma a Form of PTSD?

Religious trauma can be intimately connected and share many similarities with the development of post-traumatic stress disorder and complex PTSD, or c-PTSD.

This kind of trauma is characterized by prolonged, continuous exposure to traumatic events. Religious trauma syndrome, or RTS, often manifests over a long period, with religious groups slowly affecting a person’s mental health, decision-making, critical thinking, and more.

Signs of Religious Trauma

Religious trauma can affect people differently, and each person will have their own unique experiences with religious trauma.

Individuals and their friends and families should all be aware of potential signs of religious trauma. This can empower each person to identify toxic religious communities and best address RTS with a mental health professional.

What Are Signs of Religious Trauma?

There are various signs that an individual may be experiencing religious trauma or continuing to cope with its prolonged effects. Some symptoms of religious trauma include:

Compulsive perfectionism

Faith crisis or becoming disillusioned with spirituality

Self-hatred, low self-esteem, or compromised self-worth

Constant feelings of shame or guilt

Hypervigilance

A distinct lack of boundaries between personal life and religious communities

Identity confusion, especially among women, LGBTQIA+, and religious minority members

Manifestation of other mental illnesses, such as anxiety disorder, depression, or eating disorders

 What Does an Unhealthy Church Look Like?

Unhealthy or toxic churches or religious institutions can come in many forms, but there are some signs of an unhealthy church that can help an individual begin the healing process.

An unhealthy church may show the following signs:

Focuses on punishment, damnation(hell), guilt, shame, and other negative beliefs about oneself

Has strict, authoritarian, and absolute rules

Causes an individual to feel belittled, or as if their personal worth is less than that of the culture of the church.

Exhibits signs of religious indoctrination-start in childhood many times.

Compromises a person’s sense of personal identity or causes an individual to feel shameful about their identity, especially among members of the LGBTQ+ community.

Cultivates a culture of punishment and external forgiveness rather than personal development or personal spiritual exploration.

Focuses on personal or financial sacrifice to maintain good standing with God or the church.

Gaslighting or manipulating a person’s religious beliefs and sense of self in order to control their behavior

Using religion, scripture, or doctrine to protect otherwise abusive individuals or to facilitate otherwise abusive relationships

Feeling forced to stay in actively harmful situations or relationships based on the approval of spiritual leaders

When a person has been denied the opportunity to make personal decisions due to the pressures of religious figures

Experiencing religious trauma often has long-lasting effects on a person’s mental health, self-worth, beliefs, perspectives, and more. Many of these beliefs can be detrimental and even compromise a person’s emotional, mental, and physical health.


What Are the Long-Term Effects of Religious Trauma?

Religious trauma has lasting effects on an individual, necessitating the need for professional treatment and clinicians to address these effects.

Some of the long-term effects of trauma include:

Pervasive feelings of shame, guilt, and low self-worth

Panic attacks

Flashbacks to specific traumatic experiences or instances of spiritual abuse

Compromised personal relationships, or inability to nurture personal relationships

Difficulty trusting others

Pervasive feelings of hopelessness, especially in combination with guilt, as well as blaming oneself for all negative aspects of life

Depression

Confusion or compromised decision-making skills, especially when outside of the faith community

Dissociation or compromised sense of personal identity

Fear of eternal damnation

Anxiety

Anger

Feelings of isolation, both in regards to a person’s faith as well as isolation from others, even outside of any given religious group

Suicidal ideation

How Does Religious Trauma Affect the Brain?

Some of the ways in which religious trauma affects the brain include:

Emotional, sexual, and social delays, especially when engaging in an unhealthy religious environment from a young age or throughout childhood

Compromised decision-making skills and critical thinking skills, especially outside the context of a religious institution

Low self-esteem or perspective of self-worth

Panic attacks, anxiety, and depression

Trauma of any kind can profoundly affect the brain, affecting a person’s beliefs, perspectives, attitudes, mental health, and much more. Religious trauma and its connection to post-traumatic stress disorder and c-PTSD can have equally as profound effects.

Religious trauma can also inform the development of other mental illnesses and disorders. This includes anything from anxiety disorders and depression to post-traumatic stress disorder, eating disorders, bipolar disorder, social disorders, and even substance use disorder to cope.

Again I want to make clear, I do not believe all churches are toxic. I do believe everyone should earnestly take a look at their situation and examine the practices and doctrines they are being taught. There are very subtle things that can be missed. I think parents need to be engaged in what their children are being taught by others and take a hard look at what they are teaching their own children in the way of eternal damnation(hell).

More later…

THL




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